Parental Love Is Never Saying Told You So

WSJ is WRONG in opining “The Toughest Part of Being a Grandparent is Ceding Control.” After 22 years of doting on my 4 kids & ensuring a debt free life after college, I have no trouble letting ‘em raise their own families. Biggest problem? Not saying “I told you so.”

That, and remembering to keep reinforcing the reality in my kids’ psyche that I will still love them whole heartedly forever and I day, as well as their own children. Yet, we’re told that “Grandparents in the 21st century involves shifting roles, new boundaries & online advice.”

Baloney. That is, every generation deals with the “shifting roles” and “new boundaries” issues, whether it involve “online advice,” Dr. Spock’s wisdom in print, or Great Grandma-ma's weird old wives' tales. I still recall my dad and his dad navigate their relationship easily enough. Grandpa, who was half the size of his sons, was famous for using “the belt” to enforce discipline; yet, when I heard him give advice to his parented sons 40 years later, immigrant Grandpa was the soul of reason, logic & understanding. “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he’d repeatedly exclaimed in broken English during any disciplinary episode, “If [Davd] doesn’t want to eat spinach, it’s ok.” WHAT? “Thank you, Grandpa,” I’d say. And, as a bonus, he ALWAYS made sure to have my favorite pineapple slices to help wash down anything else inedible on the dinner table. Nothing but smiles, smiles, smiles. What a guy. But, I never heard him say to my dad, “I told you so.”

Davd Soul